While I was having lunch with a new Al-Anon friend, she asked me, “Who brought you to Al‑Anon?” It took me just seconds to respond. I brought myself to this program. You see, I have learned that no alcoholic, nor any other person, caused my actions, reactions, or responses to the people, places, and things in my life.
When I first came to Al-Anon, like many of us, I came because of someone else’s drinking. I naively thought that if only the drinking would stop, I would be okay, and my problems would be over. That way of thinking led me to leave Al-Anon after only being in the program for a couple of years. My marriage had ended and so, I thought, did my problem.
It turned out that not living with active alcoholism did ease some of my problems initially, but I hadn’t yet realized the effect of multi-generational alcoholism in my life. The way I looked at things, the way I responded to situations, and the way I felt and thought were all distorted by being raised in the disease of alcoholism.
Years later, I returned to Al-Anon for a different reason: to save myself. I now work this program for me, to the best of my ability on any given day, and I walk through it with a loving Higher Power and a Sponsor who helps guide me through the difficult situations life continues to throw at me at times.
I am a very grateful member of this worldwide fellowship, and I deserve to be here because I know now this is where I belong.
By Monique R.
The Forum, March 2026
Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, Virginia, USA.