When I first arrived in Al-Anon, I wanted a list of ways to keep my alcoholic loved one sober. I was surprised when no one gave me a list of what to do. What I heard over and over were the slogans. I came to understand that any list I found in Al‑Anon would be for me to follow, not to keep the alcoholic sober.
I was able to use the slogans to take my mind off his behavior and to help me focus on my own. “Live and Let Live,” “How Important Is It?” and “Let Go and Let God” were the beginning of my recovery and gave me a way to get the crazy thoughts and ideas out of my head. When I wanted to tell the alcoholic, or anyone else I wanted to control, how to live their life, I went to the slogans to quiet my mind and give me something else to think about.
As I grew in recovery, I realized I had come to Al‑Anon to fix the alcoholic, but I stayed to fix me. I am not fixed yet; however, I now have so many tools I can use to help myself live a peaceful, serene, and joyful life whether the alcoholic is drinking or not.
By Lorna F.
The Forum, August 2025
Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, Virginia, USA.